Here Without You
by Ellie DuGray
Summary: Tristan in North Carolina, Rory in Stars Hollow. Watch as two penpals grow into something more.


**Summary:** Tristan in North Carolina, Rory in Stars Hollow… Watch as geography goes away and friendship turns into something more.

**Spoilers:** To 'The Break Up' and 'Run Away Little Boy'.

**Genre:** Romance/ Song.

**Rate:** G, I guess.

**Disclaimer:** Not mine yet!

**Lyrics:** 3 Doors Down's 'Here Without You'.

**Author's Notes:** This goes to my readers who are expectantly waiting for 'Baby Of Mine's next chapter. I know what I want to write, I just can't make it happen. Please wait patiently. I love you, guys!

**Here Without You**

Five-thirty in the morning, and Tristan DuGrey was awake already. He was quiet, listening to his colleagues' regular, quiet breathing and, of course, thinking of _her_.

Her being Rory Gilmore, the only girl he had ever wanted, the only girl he would never have.

He sighed deeply and got up.

_A hundred days have made me older_

_Since the last time I saw your pretty face_

Rory looked longingly at the locker that used to be Tristan's. Truth to be told, she missed him deeply, but she'd never admit it to anyone, including the two people she liked and would be most upset if she ever mentioned him: Paris and Dean.

Lorelai and Lane, however, knew she was sorry for yelling that she hated him and missed him.

"**Tristan's in a boarding school in London, his mother told me"**, Summer said arrogantly, and Rory sighed exasperated. She and Paris were the only ones in Chilton who knew where Tristan really was.

_A thousand lies have made me colder_

_And I don't think I can look at this the same_

Lane Kim was sitting near the Stars Hollow's bus stop and smiled brightly as she recognized the dreadful face of her best friend, who was walking down the bus. Rory smiled back, and Lane beamed to herself as she recognized a hint of sadness inside of Rory's usually bright blue eyes.

"**Hey, Lane,"** Rory greeted with a smile.

"**Hey, Rory. How was school?"**

"**Awful. Where's Dean?"**

"**He's just about to come, so I'll be quick"**, Lane said as she dug out a folded piece of paper of her trousers' back pocket. Rory looked confused at the Asian-American as Lane opened her hand and placed the paper on her palm, clasping her fingers around it.

"**What's that?"**

"**A little surprise to cheer you up"**, Lane said with a smile, squeezing Rory's shoulder gently as she hurried back home. Dean approached his girlfriend with a smile and gave her a peck on her cheek.

"**Hey, Rory. Why was Lane so in a hurry?"**

"**Uh… She's probably sneaking out. I don't know"**, she answered as she pecked his cheek in return.

"**Oh. What did she give you?"**

"**I have no idea"**, she smiled uneasily and opened the paper discretely. Dean could see there was something written on it, but couldn't make the words. However, a big smile appeared on her face, the kind he hadn't seen for quite some time.

"**So? What's it?"**

"**Oh, no big deal. Names of some songs, that's all"**, she replied with a cheerfulness that's fully Rory, putting the paper carefully on her shirt's front pocket.

Dean slung an arm around her shoulders, and started to talk about something that had happened at school. Rory made the appreciative noises when needed, but wasn't paying really attention.

All her being was anticipating the moment she'd sit at her kitchen table, that afternoon, and would write, with her beautiful feminine handwriting, a apologize letter for Tristan, whose military school's address Lane had gotten somehow and was written on the paper Mrs. Kim's daughter had given the Gilmore girl earlier.

_But all the miles that separate_

_They disappear now that I'm dreaming of your face_

It was lunch time at the McKinnon Military Academy For Boys, and Tristan, playing distractedly with his food, was busier staring at Rory's picture, drawn in one of his sleepless nights. The former Chilton's King smiled affectionately as his fingers ran over Rory's lips at the sketch. They had tasted so sweet…

"**DuGrey, who is the girl?"** A colleague and roommate asked Tristan, curiously pointing at the sketch.

"**It's…"** He paused hesitantly. **"… a friend of my school back home. Rory"**, he added after a beat. The other boy smiled at him knowingly, understandingly.

"**She's your girlfriend, isn't she?"** The guy, Mark Raymond, asked. Tristan looked surprised at the boy, and Mark chuckled. **"Man, every guy in this hellhole has someone to think about at nights or spare time".**

"**Oh"** Tristan made quietly. **"She's not my girlfriend"**, he replied in full honesty. **"But… I love her".**

"**You have good taste, man"**, Mark said nodding approvingly. He fished a picture out of his pocket and showed it to Tristan. Smiling at the photograph there was a blond girl with green eyes, a red-haired baby with Mark's bluish eyes in her arms. **"This is Kelsey. And the baby is my princess, Anne-Emily".**

"**They're beautiful"**, Tristan smiled at his friend. Mark smiled proudly back at Tristan.

_I'm here without you, baby_

_But you're still in my lonely mind_

As they talked over coffee and strawberry pie at Luke's, Rory noticed Dean's curious look at her backpack more than once. Knowing what he wanted, and not wishing that he found out she had Tristan's address, she changed subjects so to distract him.

"**So, what are you doing tonight?"** She asked running her finger at the rim of her cup. Dean smiled fondly at her, sipping from his vanilla mocha.

"**What do you want to do tonight?"** He shot back half-playfully, half-seriously. Knowing she had a long, friendly letter to write to Tristan that night, Rory shrugged.

"**Chilton's stuff. Mr. Medina decided I shouldn't have any privileges despite the fact that I'm his fiancée's daughter and gave us a very hard assignment to do. And there's also that Lit test Friday, so I have to study"**, she smiled weakly at his disappointed look. **"Can I get a raincheck? I promise you'll have my full attention this weekend".**

He smiled brightly, and Rory, whose mind was back to the address safely hidden in her bag, tried to place that smile in her mind, instead of the naughty, sexy smirk that had been haunting her dreams and days lately.

A smirk that was usually accompanied with a pair of bright blue eyes and a perpetually tousled hair that seemed made of gold and looked very silky. That smirk usually curved full, pink lips that had been very soft under hers and that had made her… tingle all over.

"**Oh, shit!"** She jumped up, praying she wasn't blushing madly. Why was that kiss haunting her again? **"I promised I'd help mom at the inn. Bye!"**

With that, she ran away, leaving a very confused Dean behind.

_I think about you, baby_

_And I dream about you all the time_

Two weeks later, both Mark and Tristan were perplexed when Brandon Phillips dropped an envelope on Tristan's desk during English class. Even more perplexed Tristan was when he looked at the letter's sender. A smile curved his lips, and he showed Mark who had written to him.

Mark looked amazed and confused. He and Tristan were now the best friends, and Mark and Kelsey had invited Tristan to be Anne-Emily's godfather when they got home for summer vacation. Tristan had told how he had made Rory's school life a living hell, and how she hated him.

That was the reason why Mark looked so deep in confusion at his friend. Tristan himself was confused. How had Rory gotten McKinnon Academy's address and why in hell was she writing to him?

"**Lorelai Leigh Gilmore – Mary"**, he whispered and, next to him, Mark was impressed at the way Tristan's eyes lit up as he read Rory's full name.

"**Go on, man"**, Mark urged. **"Read it".**

Tristan nodded and carefully opened the envelope, pulling the three sheets of notebook paper out of it.

_**Dear Tristan,**_

_**It's most sure that this will surprise you. After all, we didn't part on best ways, and we never were exactly friends. But… I don't know. I must say I miss bantering with you. Paris is witty, but I can break her quickly. That never happened with you and I had to be on my toes if I wanted to leave you speechless.**_

Both Tristan and Mark laughed at that. Tristan told his friend:

"**That had never happened. It was more usual that I'd say something laced with sexual innuendo and she'd blush like crazy".**

Mark replied:

"**Man, she sounds a lot like Kelsey when we first met. Kelsey was the purest girl in school and that got my eye. I was Demery's prince and wanted her for my princess. But go on".**

_**I first must say that I'm sorry for saying I hated you. I never hated you. Sure, you drove me crazy insisting to take me out on a date and usually frustrated me, but I liked it. It was kinda fun. So, I'm sorry.**_

_**Now that I've apologized, how are things over there? Are you king of McKinnon Academy like you were of Chilton?**_

_I'm here without you, baby_

_But you're still with me in my dreams_

_And tonight, girl, there's only you and me_

A few days later, Lorelai smiled as she picked a dark blue envelope from their mailbox. Tristan's name was capriciously written on the back, Rory's name written in gold at its face.

Rory was lying on the couch, reading for the hundredth time Nora Roberts as J. D. Robb's _Naked In Death_, when her mother skipped in.

"**Your mail, ma'am"**, she said with a bow. Rory giggled and took the envelope from Lorelai's hands, her eyes lightening up as she read who had sent her the mail.

"**He wrote back, mom!"** She exclaimed, happiness and relief dripping from her voice and a large grin on her face.

"**Well, open it up already!"** Lorelai demanded, jumping on the couch next to Rory's. **"You can't read the letter without opening the envelope, unless you have X-ray vision"**. The inn's manager narrowed her eyes suspiciously. **"Do you?"**

Rory rolled her eyes.

And that was how Tristan's and Rory's weekly mailing began. Rory would write to Tristan on Fridays, telling how her week had been and which were her plans for the weekends – Tristan noticed that, progressively, she mentioned less and less of Dean. Tristan would receive the letter on Sunday and would write back, telling how life at McKinnon Military Academy For Boys was, and which were his plans for after school and college.

Mark and Kelsey – who were planning marriage – were the only ones who knew Rory and Tristan were in touch. Lorelai, Lane, Luke and her grandparents were the only ones who knew, from her side. Paris was still very touchy over Tristan's abrupt departure, and Dean's jealousy of Rory's friendship with Jess was enough for the Gilmore girl to deal with.

But anything can't stay secret forever and, one day five months later, Paris was waiting for Rory at the Gilmore's place when the mailman passed by and left Tristan's envelope. Rory and Lorelai were out at the Doose's Market and, when they arrived home, Paris looked like a volcano ready to explode.

"**What's wrong, Paris?"** Rory asked. The blonde girl got up and shook the envelope dangerously close to Rory's nose.

"**You've been writing to Tristan behind my back since when?"** She spat bitterly. Rory extracted the envelope from Paris' hand and shoved it into her pocket, shrugging it off while doing it.

"**For quite some months now. It's no big deal, Paris, just stuff about Chilton and his school".**

"**If it isn't no big deal, why haven't you told me?"** Paris screamed. Babette showed up in her porch.

"**Is there a prob, sugar?"** She asked Lorelai, glaring ugly at Paris, who was fuming.

"**No, Babette. Go back in! Thanks for wanting to help"**, Lorelai smiled and then turned to her daughter and the visitor. **"Okay, you wanna yell at each other? Fine. But do it inside. And, if I remember clearly, last time I checked this still was a free country. Rory can write to Tristan if she feels like it".**

"**Rory can write to whom?"** A male voice came from behind them. Rory closed her eyes and sighed deeply, preparing for the next explosion.

If Paris' fit wasn't enough, now she had to deal with Dean's too.

_The miles just keep rolling_

_As people leave their way to say hello_

Dean looked like he had been slapped on the face. If Rory's 'perfectly-innocent' friendship with Mariano wasn't enough, now DuGrey had to come back to the picture! He was red with anger and he hoped Rory regretted her whatever-ship with Tristan. But, when his eyes met her, Dean was surprised to see a rock-hard determination shining into the blue orbs.

"**I've been writing to Tristan"**, she said coldly. Dean marched towards her, but Lorelai stepped between him and her daughter. A fourth person suddenly cut in:

"**Needs help there, Mary?"**

Lorelai, Rory, Paris and Dean all looked around, to have a glance of the new visitor. Glaring with worriedly clouded eyes at Dean, stood Tristan DuGrey, in khaki pants and a blue shirt that fitted him like a second skin.

Rory smiled widely and, with a squeal, ran to him, throwing her arms around his neck. His arms wrapped up around her waist and he kissed her shoulder.

"**Tristan!"** She exclaimed happily, her voice muffled against his shoulder. He smelled of fallen leaves, of wood and sea. **"When did you arrive?"**

"**Yesterday"**, he said on her ear, his warm breath tickling her earlobe. She smelled like vanilla and strawberry and purity. Dean was shooting him dirty looks, but Tristan ignored him. **"Did I interrupt anything?"** He whispered into her ear.

"**Dean and Paris found out about us exchanging letters"**, she whispered back, noticing for the first time the tall dark-haired young man with blue eyes, the young woman with blond hair and blue eyes and the red-haired baby with blue eyes on her arms, standing next to the parked Corvette, watching everything with an amused smile. **"Who are your friends?"**

"**Oh, God, I'm sorry! I forgot you guys!"** He told the man.

"**We kinda noticed it, Tris"**, the woman said with a complacent smile. Tristan blushed adorably

"**Well, yeah, hum…"** He cleared his throat. Everyone noticed Rory and Tristan hadn't gone from each other's hand, and had different reactions. Lorelai and Mark smirked. Kelsey smiled. Dean glared. And Paris sighed in defeat. **"This is my buddy from military school, Mark, and that is his wife Kelsey. And the baby is my goddaughter and 'niece', Anne-Emily. Guys, meet Rory Gilmore, her mother Rory, our… friend Paris, and Dean, Rory's boyfriend"**, he introduced.

"**My ex"**, Rory corrected him. Tristan, Paris, Lorelai and Dean looked at her with huge eyes. Mark and Kelsey exchanged a look and a smile as they noticed the new sparkle of hope shimmering inside Tristan's crystal clear blue eyes.

Dean stared at Rory like she had punched him on the gut.

"**Your what?"** He asked disbelievingly. **"You're breaking up with me because of this… jerk?"**

"**No"**, she replied calmly. **"I'm breaking up with you because you've been suffocating me lately. First you want to spend every waking-outside-school minute with me. Second, I can't be friends with Jess. I'm not in love with him, I'm just his friend, but the concept of friendship can't seem to be grasped by you. Third… I don't love you. I feel like I never really did".**

Dean looked at her seriously.

"**If I leave, I'll never come back".**

"**Be my guest"**, she said. Dean gave her a last, long, sad look, and left without any other word.

"**Well, I'm sorry, Rory. I just… I don't know, can't even explain it".**

"**Cool off, Paris"**, Rory waved dismissively and smiled at her. Paris smiled back and settled her eyes at her childhood friend.

"**It's nice to see you again, Tristan. You look good"**, she said with a smile.

"**Thanks, Paris. So do you"**, he smiled back.

"**Thank you. Well, I'm going. My parents wait me for dinner"**, she said slinging her backpack on one shoulder. **"See you at school, Rory. Bye, Tristan"**, she said, and nodded at Mark and Kelsey.

"**Thank God it's over"**, Lorelai said with a smile. **"Can we go inside? My arms are numb and about to freeze"**, she smiled. Tristan and Mark hurried to help her with the bags, while Rory approached Kelsey and started to play with the baby.

_I've heard this life is overrated_

_But I hope that it gets better as we go_

"**So, what brings you to Stars Hollow?"** Rory asked hours later. Mark and Kelsey had gone for a walk and some quality time, Lorelai offering to baby sit Anne-Emily. Rory had given Tristan and his friends the grand tour of Stars Hollow, and now she and her pen-pal enjoyed the quiet, starry night, each one with a cup of steamy hot chocolate, courtesy of Luke.

"**I have some news that are too good to be given over letter"**, he said seriously. She missed the happy, mischievous twinkle inside of his bright blue eyes.

"**Go on"**, Rory urged. He looked at her, seriously, and then a huge grin broke into the serious mask.

"**Can I have your notes? Cause the king is back to Chilton, upgraded".**

Rory let out a shriek of joy and dropped her cup of chocolate, throwing herself at him. Somehow, he feel on his back and with her on top of him, they both laughing hard.

Then, suddenly, it changed. Rory was very aware of her attraction towards Tristan, and, well, we all know he loved her. Slowly, oh so slowly, Rory lowered her face and, with a gentleness and kindness they both didn't know they had, their lips met on a soft kiss.

"**Won't you burst in tears and run away?"** He teased after the kiss was over.

"**Tristan?"**

"**Hmmm?"**

"**Kiss me".**

He happily obliged.

_Everything I know, and anywhere I go_

_It gets hard but it won't take away my love_

Two months later, Rory, Tristan, Paris and her new boyfriend – surprise, surprise, thanks to a Rory's little matchmaking, it was Jess – were on one of Louise's birthday parties – this was the third. Tristan had really come back to Chilton, bringing Mark and Kelsey with him, and he and Rory were officially, and happily, dating for the last month. More than ever Tristan was sure he loved her, but didn't want to freak her out by saying the words.

Rory knew that, this time, with Tristan it really was love, but couldn't get herself to say the words, considering it was still a little early. What if she were the one to hear an awkward, uncomfortable 'thank you' this time?

It was too scary.

Tristan and Rory were dancing to 3 Doors Down's 'Here Without You', and he spotted Mark and Kelsey talking quietly amongst themselves – their wedding was a success from day one – and Paris looking peaceful, calm with her head resting against Jess' shoulder.

Tristan was semi-consciously singing along with the music, much to Rory's surprise, and laughed softly as he noticed her quizzical look at him.

"**It was my thinking-of-Rory's song while I was exiled"**, he explained in a hushed voice. **"Because I was there without you, but you were with me all the time".**

Her eyes were brimming with tears and, without thinking too much, the words just slipped past her lips.

"**I love you, Tristan".**

Relief, surprise, love filled his cobalt blue eyes and he kissed her with all the gentleness he had. When the kiss was over, he rested his forehead against hers and whispered:

"**I love you too, Rory Gilmore"**, he smiled as she closed her eyes, and brushed away the lone tear that trickled down her cheek. **"Everyday so much, I don't know how to live without this feeling".**

_And when the last one falls_

_When it's all said and done_

_It gets hard but it won't take away my love_


End file.
